A Voice That Must Not Remain Silent: Why We Must Stop Hiding Our Suffering

“Why did you write this, and what do you hope to achieve?”

This question was recently asked by one of the closest people in my life. I didn’t have to think long about it; the soul knows what it wants, but words sometimes fail to express everything we feel. In my case, I rely more on the “writer’s quill” than on my mouth. I love the sound of the word compared to the modern “keyboard.”

Ideally, my answer would be to raise awareness of what is invisible to the eye and stop it. However, I’m not naive enough to believe that one book, one story, will stop the world’s oldest profession. It’s unrealistic to think we can change the world. The world itself is perfect; the problem lies with the people living in it. We can’t change anyone who isn’t willing to change; people must change themselves because they want to, not because someone else asks them to. Nevertheless, if I sparked something that could change even just one life, let alone more, that would be a huge success.

I know that “Elis” is full of bitter words that are difficult to accept, especially for those who disagree with its content. This story wasn’t written by you but by life itself. It’s important to realise that it was the hands of a broken soul, torn to pieces, that typed on that keyboard, drawing inspiration from vast life experiences, memories, pain, and joy.

She tried to show everything as she experienced it, consumed by emotions. Her soul screamed words that no one was supposed to hear, yet she decided to share them with the whole world.

That girl wasn’t angry, bitter, or seeking revenge; with the purest of intentions, she decided to highlight what’s important and what everyone should see.

She wanted to reveal the darker side of the world, hidden behind layers of deceit and lies.

I was afraid for far too long, and I am still ashamed today. But if I had chosen to listen to my fear, I would have stayed hidden forever, and no one would know how complicated things can be especially the invisible ones. Too few women talk about what happens to them, and it doesn’t even have to follow the path I took. Too few women share the things that hurt them, hiding behind shame and fear. They believe that if they lock it away inside and don’t talk about it, it will disappear, but they are wrong. It will never go away; it will never disappear, but they will be able to cope much better, or at least soothe the pain that torments them from within, if they talk about it.

Those who don’t want us to talk about our pain and suffering are the ones who bear a part of the blame. They are the ones who tormented us, and they are the ones who could be hurt if we speak. I don’t just want to speak; I want to scream. I want to scream to the whole world why people shouldn’t stay silent out of fear. I want to scream to the world why we shouldn’t remain quiet. Only those who profit from our silence, those who benefit from our suffering, stand to gain from it.

I think I’m not speaking only for myself when I say that it’s important to break this silent struggle and tear down the walls that society has built around us. Why do women feel ashamed when they’ve been hurt? Shouldn’t the one who hurt them be the one to feel shame? Why do so many people walk around us daily with charming smiles but black souls? Why do such individuals repeatedly commit terrible acts? Why does no one stop them?

Because those of us who should speak up remain silent!

My book focuses primarily on prostitution and pimping in Ireland, but I think it opens up many other topics. Public secrets that are kept hidden, things no one dares to expose. Do you think the authorities don’t know what’s happening in Ireland? That the Garda has no idea what’s happening to these girls? You are mistaken!

The app I mentioned in my book, the one designed to protect women who have chosen the path of escorting or have been forced into it, offers the possibility to share information about predators with the Garda directly. The authorities receive the phone number and a description of the incident.

But who cares about a nameless girl who was attacked and raped? She was asking for it, wasn’t she?

What can they do when the girl decides to sweep it under the rug and pretend it never happened, with just a tiny note in a nameless app: “This man is a terrifying attacker; he took my body, my soul, and now I have to hide my tears and paint another face with makeup, one that will help me smile at the many others I will meet.”

Hiding pain behind a smile is powerful, but only superficially. It took me a long time to realise that pretending nothing happened doesn’t make the pain go away. It will always be there; it will eat us alive from the inside. It will destroy us, wake us in the night, and haunt us during the day. It may disappear for a while and then return in a much more terrifying form.

There are things that should never happen to any human being, but unfortunately, they do, and more often than we think. They happen closer to us than we can imagine and affect us all more than we realise. Just because you don’t feel someone’s pain doesn’t mean it isn’t there.

A person is capable of enduring much and surviving through hell, but it never comes without consequences. We get used to everything. Prisoners become so accustomed to prison life that they’re unable to live in freedom and return to what they know. Girls who were sold like pieces of meat go back to what they know despite the suffering. Women who were beaten and raped return to abusive men.

Psychology often explains this phenomenon as the trauma cycle or learned helplessness. Victims can develop a dependency on their abuser or traumatic environment because, even though it harms them, it represents something familiar and “safer” than the unknown alternatives. Another factor is damaged self-esteem—victims often believe they don’t deserve a better life. This cycle may also include emotional manipulation, where the abuser gives the victim moments of love and recognition, making them stay or return to a toxic environment.

But what if it were your daughter, sister, or someone else you deeply care about? Just because someone is a stranger or unknown to you doesn’t mean they’re not suffering. Being in a hopeless situation doesn’t mean there’s no way out or that a better life isn’t waiting for you. Don’t let fear control you. Often, what we fear the most is exactly what we need to do. I was also afraid to publish Elis, but sometimes, you must overcome your fear so you no longer have to breathe the air of someone else’s making.

-Anna Rajmon